Dear 2020 Lian,
A lot of things have happened this past year. You struggled so much. You lost your identity, started showing signs of depression, cried yourself to sleep so many nights.
You never knew that that would happen to you, and even though it was one of the toughest moments of your life, it was an experience that helped you grow into the person you are today.
I know that it wasn’t easy for you to do the things that you did. Your mindset limited you, and your personal feelings and morals contradicted each other. You put other people before you, and pretended that you were okay, so that other people wouldn’t worry about you. You sacrificed so much, for both others and yourself.
Now, you are changing.
You are changing your ways, your mindset, yourself. You are transforming into someone who loves and cares for themselves, and you are surrounding yourself with the people and things that make you happy.
I’m really proud of how far you have come.
You’ve experienced hardships that many people won’t face until later on in life. You’ve continued to shine and stay strong even in the darkest of times. I know you always thought that you were broken, and a problem to other people, but sometimes, the people who think they are the most fragile, are the ones who are the strongest. And baby, you are strong. You are enough. And you are worth it.
Don’t let your past control your present. You are who you are today because of your hardships and experiences. You can’t control the past or your future, but you can live in the present.
So, live in the present moment. Look at things from different perspectives. Take every opportunity you get, even if it scares you. I want you to do some things for me okay? I want you to:
- love yourself first
- appreciate yourself more
- always speak kindly to yourself (imagine you are talking to your best friend – talk like that to yourself)
- be honest with yourself
- not be afraid of a challenge
- invest in yourself
I love you so much, and I’m here for you every step of the way.
Forever and Always, Lian
(26 September 2021)