This week is probably going to be one of the most stressful weeks ever. With 4 assessments due, a jam packed weekend with social activities, extra-curriculars, and tutoring, my mental health and sleep seems like the least important thing on the list.
(The next following paragraphs shall include swear words, so be warned before you chase after me!)
So how the actual fuck am I supposed to get everything done? And not just done on time, but completed to a high standard?
It seems to me like schools have absolutely no care about our mental health. I mean, disregarding the amount of times they say “Enjoy your holidays! Do something fun! Go out with friends!”, they still continue to give us a shitload of assessments due in the span of 4 weeks.
Sometimes, I feel like school takes up our entire week. We spend roughly around 6 hours at school, with approximately 1 to 2 hrs of travel time, and on top of that, we spend our weekends studying or doing assessments. This in itself seems like an absurd amount of hours to spend doing “school work,” and by the end of the day, we just want to fall in a heap, cry and sleep.
School sets up unrealistic expectations of us. They tell us so much bullshit on a day to day basis like “Just put in effort and you will see results!” and “It won’t take you that long to finish!”, but they continue to disregard the fact that we, just like any other human, have lives outside of school. Lives that consist of more than just studying and doing assessments.
Take for example, people who do competitive sports. They spend hours after school training and physically pushing their bodies, and probably don’t get enough sleeping already, yet continue to go to school for 6 hours the next day. This itself is tiring for any individual, but on top of that, they have games on the weekends, and occasionally during the week. On top of this, is school and everything that goes along with it – aka assessments.
I myself live a more creative life, if you will. I have music 2 to 3 times a week, with some days including both band rehearsals and one on one tutorials. I’ve been playing saxophone for 6 years now, and it’s honestly becoming more of a chore to practice for me. It’s not that I don’t like playing, it’s just because I’m so exhausted by the end of the day, that the thought of even trying to play is exhausting. Yet I wouldn’t give it up for the world. I love the feeling when I play something right, or in rehearsals and performance when I play confidently and the ensemble just soars.
We all have different priorities in our life. Whether it be school, sports, or music, the biggest priority that we forget is ourselves and our mental health. We spend our lives pushing ourselves mentally and physically, which most of the time ends in burning ourselves out. Personally speaking, this happens on a regular basis for me. And it’s not that I don’t prioritise myself or my mental health, it’s just the fact that my other priorities demand too much of me and I end up focusing on them instead.
Take school for example. This week, I have 4 assessments due, and also a big project due the week after, which I have yet to complete. On Monday (tomorrow), I have to wake up at 5am for band, have one-on-one tutorials after school, and then I have jujitsu training from 7pm to 9pm. I have a maths test tomorrow as well, so I just spent 2 hours studying for that. On Tuesday, I have a design and tech presentation, which I still have to write a full script for. I have 2 hours of music rehearsals on Wednesday, with an hour of tutoring on Thursday. And of course, I have 2 assessments due at 9am on Friday, which I haven’t completed yet.
This is just counting the stuff I have during the week, and not my weekend!
Balancing school and the rest of my life is hard, and I honestly haven’t found a way to perfectly balance or harmonise it. With so much on my plate, it feels like taking care of myself and my mental health is a lesser priority, with the main priority being to just get everything done, despite the consequences that may come along with it. By the end of the week, I know I’m going to be burnt out, which will negatively impact both my physical and mental health.
How I’m going to survive? I don’t even know myself.
Most nights will probably consist of me staying up late, feeling sick the next day, but continuing the cycle none-the-less, in the hopes of finishing everything on time. Most nights are going to be spent in tears, midnight mental breakdowns, and ranting to people who probably don’t even care.
The worst feeling is when your priorities clash together and expect so much of you, and you end up sacrificing yourself to fulfil them. But hey, I guess that’s just another one of life’s challenges. :/